THE FIRST AND LAST

Well here I am again posting on my blog for the second time in three months. My stolen internet seems to be hit or miss and makes me angry when my blogs get erased when I am trying to post them. I want to tell everybody about my first time gambling last week that didn’t involve the slut machines. I tried my luck at roulette, since I see j-bone get raped at the table when he plays I wanted to see what the experience was everything that he talked it up to be. Well what can I say, I came out a plus 100 bucks. This after a serious of red and blacks that didn’t fall for me I decided to use an old super troopers saying and went with the “ah f*uck it” approach. This included throwing down what was left on my chips on black except one $5 dollar chip, and you may ask what I did with that chip. Well I threw that bad boy down on split 00/0. I turned and said it hasn’t hit 0 in a while and it will hit here. Sure enough double zero hit and zesty came out with around a 100 bucks on the day. What people don’t know is that the informer on Sunday thought he could match this phenomenal round of betting that I just had experienced. Well sure enough he tried, oh boy did he try. “Ya he tried to lose all of his money” as the random guy behind me just stated, he couldn’t be any more correct about that statement. One of the most painful things I watch the informer do is try and take a dip, it is just like watching the adopted kid get taken away from adam sandler in big daddy. The informer soon changed my mind, I found a new painful thing to watch the informer do, and that is watching him gamble. After a serious of disgusting bets he made on Sunday football games, I reassured him that the bears game was lock, with the bears winning. This must been a popular bet in the informers family because his older brother made the same bet. As everybody knows the bears did not win, and I had to sit there and watch as the informer dealt with this problem by buying several, (and by several I mean too many), rounds of cherry bombs. I guess his way of dealing with a terrible day of football picks is that he would punish a bottle of Cherry UV instead of punishing himself. This now brings me to the most painful thing I have witnessed the informer do. To watch him struggle and breathe while he sleeps, along with his uncomfortable maneuvers and disgruntled looks, this is quite a sight. To add to this pile of humility when the informer wakes up from a far from refreshing night of sleep, he struggles to try and wrap himself around what time of day it is and what his daily tasks could be for the day. He soon finds the answer and that is to put his far from clean head back down on the pillow to close his eyes once more.
Now I want to take time to right about. clayton -“cankles”, “fat-ass”, ”tubby”, “Gomez” –goos. Cankles told me the other day to write on my blog. In fact his direct quote was “when are you ever going to write on your blog again”. So zesty simply replied with “I am having writers block, I have nothing to write about”. The cankly one replied with “well write about me”. Well cankles here is 5 minutes in the spotlight and me writing about anything interesting in your life enjoy it. This is what I have to say about the thankly one, get ready cause here it comes. The life and times of clayton Gomez summed up in at least a page, enjoy:





























And that’s all folks, excuse me while I go fill up cankles mom’s water dish
Holla at your boy
The zest

zesty has a very big problem

Yes, what is new i am back and i am angry, with who you may say well than who else than our great freinds at espn. i mean talk about bad television and when you click the info button on the remote when you are on sportscenter do you know what is says? Emmy award winning show, give me a break. I have already complained about their decsion on replaying college football games on monday night. this time i am very angry at there reporting on the a.l. central. i have been watching this race for the playoffs since in pretty much started. what i dont understand is why at every game break during the mets and cubs game did they go to the brewers game. ya i know they are in the hunt as well in the n.l. but there are other teams that are competing for a spot. even better is a game break to the diamond backs game, ya i guess this is probably more important than a series between the twins and sox since you know if the twins sweep them than they will probably go to the playoffs. To top this when sportscenter/baseball tonight comes on the first 5 games they report are in the n.l. and they show highlights of the whole game from every inning. but wait when the twins and sox come on for highlights they show a griffey home run, a mauer rbi, and the game ending grounder. wow talk about being informative cripes i felt like i actually watched the whole game at the h2 dome. the last hope i had was the front page of espn home page and get this the main story was about some monkey kid who knows how to shoot a basketball ....congrats espn for pissing me off. not only do you not report on a tight head to head match for a playoff spot you dont even bother placing them on television anywhere. you might say its because the twins suck or they dont have any exciting players. news flash people the twins are looking for its 5th division title since 2002. but wait zestified the twins and sox dont have any players, oh really, how about an mvp and 2 batting titles between mauer and morneu and they are still thirsty looking for some more recognition. how about a team that plays good ol' classic baseball, and most fundamentally sound teams in the league that has the payroll of about 3 players from the yankees. how about the fastest guy in baseball that is trying to let twins forget about a guy named torii hunter. how about ken griffey jr. still shelling out homers. ya i guess we better keep showing teams that are from new york since they havent won it in like 5 years or how about they report on the dodgers and rays some more and show their games since they dont mean jack shit. with the twins last series being with the royals i am not going to hold my breathe if there was another sports network i would boycott espn and watch that network. i am out

holla at ya boy

zesty

The informer

Whats up man! hey yo whats up!
Yeah whats goin on here.
Sick an tired of five-oh runnin up on the block here.
You know what Im sayin?
Yo snow, they came around here lookin for you the other day.
Word? word! bust it!
Chorus
Informer, you no say daddy me snow me Ill go blame,
A licky boom boom down.
Detective mon said daddy me snow me stab someone down the lane,
A licky boom boom down.
Informer, you no say daddy me snow me Ill go blame,
A licky boom boom down.
Detective mon said daddy me snow me stab someone down the lane,
A licky boom boom down.
Police them come an now they blow down me door,
One him come crawl through,
through my window,
So then they put me in the back the car at the station,
From that point on me reach my destination,
When the destination reached,
it was the east detention,
where themWhipped down me pants,
looked up me bottom, so
Chorus
Bigger they are they think they have more power,
Theyre on the phone me say that on (every) hour,
Me for want to use it once an now me call me lover,
Lover who Ill be callin is the one tammy,
An me love her in me heart down to my belly,
Yes me daddy me snow me I feel cool an deadly,
As the one mc shan an the one daddy snow,
Together we-a loveem as a tor-na-do.
Chorus
Listen for me, you better listen for me now.
Listen for me, you better listen for me now.
When me rockin the microphone me rock it steady,
Yes sir, daddy me snow me are the article done.
But in the in an the out of a dance them they say where you come from,
People them say you come from jamaica,
But me born an raised in the ghetto thats the one I want you to know,
Pure black people mon thats all I mon know.
Yeah me shoes are tear up an me toes used to show,
Where me born in on the one toronto, so
Chorus
Come with a nice young lady. intelligent,
Yes shes gentle an irie.Everywhere me go,
me never left her at all.Yes,
its daddy snow me are the roam dance mon.
Roam between a dancin in a in a nation-a.
You never know say daddy me snow me are the boom shakata.
Me never lay-a down flat in that one cardboard box.
Yes say me daddy me snow me Ill go reachin at the top,
so...ChorusWhy would he?
Me sittin round cool with my dibbie dibbie girl,
Police knock my door,Lick up my pal,
Rough me up an I cant do a thingPick up my line,
when my telephone ring.Take me to the station,
Black up my hands.Trail me down, cuz Im hangin with the snowman,
What Im gonna do,Im backed an Im trapped,
Slap me in the face an took all o my gap.
They have no clues an they wanna get warmer,
But shan wont turn informer!
Chorus

Salaami vs Gene

SALAAM

1. Salaam attended the LaJolla Country Day School, where he played 8-man football and ran for over 100 yards in every game except for one. He was held under 100 yards against Christian High School, in an 11 man game. His team still won the game 16-13, Reminding you that it was 8 on 11 match up.

2. As a junior, Salaam had one of the best individual seasons by a running back in College football history in 1994, rushing for a school-record 2,055 yards and 24 touchdowns

3. As a rookie, he rushed for over 1,000 yards a Chicago Bears rookie record. (Reminding you that Walter Payton played for the bears.)

4. He was a Unanimous all-American and became his school's first Heisman Trophy winner besting the runner-up by 842 points.

5. Salaam is the fourth major college football player to rush for over 2,000 yards in a season

Randall Gene Moss

7.He won the Fred Biletnikoff Award (the what?), and was a finalist for the Heisman Trophy (FINISHING FOURTH in the balloting, behind RYAN LEAF).

8. In 1997, Randy Moss was quoted, in a Sports Illustrated article as saying the 1970 Marshall plane crash "was a tragedy, but it really wasn't nothing big”. (good english gene)

9. Very recently Moss did not comply with an officer's order, and she was crushed by his vehicle and fell to the ground. Moss was arrested, and a search of his vehicle revealed a small amount of marijuana. Initially charged with felony suspicion of assault with a Deadly Weapon and a misdemeanor marijuana possession, Moss pleaded guilty to a misdemeanor traffic violation and was ordered to pay a $1,200 fine and perform 40 hours of community service.

10. In August 2005, during an interview with Bryant Gumbel, Moss admitted that he has smoked marijuana during his NFL career "every blue moon." (i believe that when my poo turns purple and smells like rainbow shurbert)

11. Number of super bowl victories – the same

12. Moss in T.O.’s shadow, Salaam in Walter Paytons

Ladies and Gents i just wanted to provide the facts to the world between these two people well i should say one human being and one negatron. As you can clearly see that randy moss should be elimanated from the negatron race since he is clearly trying to ruin the human race with his fourth place finishes and pot smoking driving that kills people. Oh and not even to mention how black his heart is for not even caring about a very historic fatal plane crash from his alma mata Salaam is just an innocent running back that graced people with his finese running skills and prolific running style and a personality that melts peoples heart.

The Zest has spoken

What the ?????

yo yo you fools i am back in the blogger world with a few things that are on my mind

1. the fact that i dont know how to ever start a blog i go to the next best thing and that is just numbering my ideas. i figured out that after 16 years of education i would have some idea how to put my thoughts into well written out paragraphs with a transistion sentence to bring them together. well its either i did learn but the booze destroyed it. ......moving on

2. who the hell wants to watch the wisconsin fresno state game at 1:00am on a monday night? Not me. Is ESPN kidding me, you have to have something better to put on television. If you are going to play something from the past get a hold of the 2003 Treynor highlight film. (it has a pretty good ending i hear, back to the point) There is nothing better to watch that went on in the sports world. i know that this game was on when the played but nobody cares. I can only name one player from either team and i think he is the running back from wisconsin. i dont even think people from both of these schools could name people on the football team. anyway i didnt watch the game so i am probably going to watch it now, Go badgers.

3. Speaking of Fresno State what the hell is the huge V for on there helmets, Vandetta?

4. I am tired of seeing the informer on info commercials. The informer ya we know you can do 1,000 sit ups and push ups and chin ups and anything that ends in ups. we get it you are the spokesman for the iron gym. everybody that knows you knows that you got absolutely shredded in 4 weeks. So why dont you and chuck norris go get shredded on the island where the Lost people are. A B C ya

5. Dominoes has sandwhiches. For everybody that doesnt know one of my biggest pet peaves is when people go to a burger joint and order a chicken sandwhich, or a salad. how about when people go to a pizza place and get pasta or even go to a sandwhich place and get a pizza sub. boy oh boy does that tickle my toes the wrong way. But here i go eating my own words because wow there new sandwhiches are off the hook. i eat three a day.

6. Tina Fey can go away forever

7. Watch out for the Tobacco Heals. Ya i know what you are thinking, its UNC football, ya ya i know. i am not saying they are going to be in the bcs but i bet people start noticing them. people will see them creeping up to that top 25 spot. i know the last time i saw them play it was against a piss poor rutgers team but i think they are going to be going places and Zesty is going with his gut on this one.

8. The people of the football nation to get over the tom brady injury. all this means is that no records are going to get broken and teams arent going to lose by 35 points. Yes it hurts when you lose a starting qb ecspecially one as good as Tom Brady. I still believe that they have one of the better teams without him. How the Pats won games was definately due to the offense and mostly brady but the last time i checked the pats werent giving up points at will either. if the pats d steps up and picks up for brady they will be alright. look at the teams from the past that have made it to the super bowl. to name a few how bout the champs from last year the giants who did they have besides a terrible qb. how bout the bears from 2 years ago who finished behind the colts who was their qb besides the famous sexy rexy. how about the most famous defense in the past decade that had an absolutely terrible offense and won it on defense yes i am talking about the ravens. Do i think that Matt Castle is going to tear up the league, no, do i think he can do enough this season to make a run in the playoffs, yes. people just have to understand that the pats arent going to be blowing people out of the water, so quit talking about it

9. FX - they need to stop playing the same 4 movies everyday

"My Guy"

Hey all "Zesty" just checking in with everyone. . .

Man has it been a long summer of young girls and of course

my new man. . .

Well half man half Yettie. . .

Just wanted everyone to know how happy the two of us have been all summer. . .

In fact just thinking about having to leave him makes the Zest kind of sad. . .

I guess, though, on the bright side we will always have the magic summer we spent together in Maine. . .

All those nights seeking around the forest. . .

The late night back rubs. . .

And don't forget the animal like passion we shared together. . .

I will miss you BigFoot. . .

Good Bye My Looooooooooooooooooooooooooove!

zesty must be butter cause he is on a roll

1. the seed that miami got in the cws..... looking good for the prediction zesty made about the u winning a title in some sport this year

2. the number of teams the zest guessed right to be in the nba finals.....yes i did happen to pick the lakers...and yes the team i guessed they would play wasn't necessarily clear but i did guess they would play somebody from the eastern conference

3. how many meals a day that involve chicken at camp..... either that or big foot tastes like chicken

4. how many times i have a feeling big bad brucey daddy will end up in jail at his attempt to regain high school glory during the cws

5. the game number in the nba finals where the black mamba will put up a fifty spot....yes the zest is not putting a schnepels guarantee on it because he would love to see the best in the game right now do what he does

6. the game number the lakers win it all .....yes another nba final prediction ......the lakers win in six..... BOO YA

7. the game number the lakers will win in if they don't win in six .....

8. the guess of how many times the informer will cry if the lakers will lose the finals



* things to note
schnepels guarantee = not going to happen

serious note: i miss everybody back home .....i hope its fun....maine isn't that bad ....harry is staying in our bunk which makes things awkward every once in a while.....but besides that if feels good to be out of iowa and living on the coast .....the informer right about something funny please your serious stuff is getting awkward to read...... love you guys

holla at your boy

Zesty